When we’re little girls, we can’t help but pretend to be princesses. We will spend hours dressing up in our costume ball gowns and twirl around the room like our favorite fairytale characters, all the time wondering when our Prince Charming will come to our rescue.
Fast forward 20 years, I wasn’t wearing my used Cinderella ball gown (that my mom found at a garage sale), but I was still waiting for my prince.
I wasn't your typical married with two kids, 28-year old. No, I was a single white female living with her parents.
Oh, and I was a virgin, a 28-year old virgin.
A virgin in the 21st century is pretty unheard of, and in a world where sex has become the new norm, something must be wrong with you if you're not doing it, right?
But for me, my virginity was a personal choice and commitment which I, (and the Jonas Brothers) made to myself and the Lord at fourteen years old, because I believed that ‘True Love Waits’.
I’ll be the first to tell you that being a virgin is no easy feat. Most people see us as something they don't want to touch with a 10-foot pole. Why? Because we’re all homeschooled weirdos who have more daddy issues than Britney!
Although we’re considered to be anti-social prudes, who are more likely to adopt 15 cats before ever having a serious relationship, contrary to these beliefs, virgins do date.
I know I did. A lot actually. And every man imaginable.
I dated presumptuous guys looking for a one night stand. Guys who offered to “fix” me. Guys who thought I wasn’t pure enough. Guys like Superman who tried to sweep me off my feet and into their bed. Wanna be Ranch hands who tried to mount me. Accountants who saw sex as a transaction. And swoon-worthy charmers who *almost* persuaded me to leave my virgin ways.
But, as fate would have it, none of those relationships worked out. Obviously that was on me right? I mean it had to be something I did or frankly didn’t do (if you catch my drift).
So, like every other single female in the dating world, I started to question myself and the choice I had made.
● Did I slide into the booth wrong and give him the ick?
● Did I show him too many pictures of my dog?
● I know I get the nervous sweats, so maybe the puddles under my pits were off putting?
Of course I was frustrated and felt like there was no end in sight, and whilst my patience seemed to be growing shorter, what I failed to see was that God was using this season to draw me closer to Him. Before He could let down the gate for my prince to come, He desired for me to trust Him.
The moment I decided to shift my focus from myself to Him, God generously gave me the patience to wait. And through the waiting, not only did my relationship with Him flourish, but He revealed the type of man I wanted and deserved.
I wanted a man who loved me like the Lord. Someone who didn’t care if I was on day four of a dry shampoo. Someone who didn’t shame me for using a Girl Scout cookie as a spoon in my carton of ice cream. Someone who wanted the foundation of our relationship to be centered on Christ, instead of sex.
And whilst it took me 28 years to find him, I could have waited 28 more knowing that God was on my side.
Now, that doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t have eventually turned into a crazy dog lady (let’s be real, I’m not a cat person) who wore a custom puff paint sweatshirt and maxi jean skirts on the daily. Or, that I wouldn’t have begged and pleaded with the Lord to fill that desire in my heart as quickly as possible, because, fun fact, we all hate being alone. But, I could endure the waiting because it was in His perfect timing, not my own.
Of course, I still had those waves of doubt that sent me spiraling into pounds of fries, but just as quickly as those doubts set in, the promises from Jeremiah 29:11 reminded me of the plan He's always had for my life.
For those of you in a season of waiting, trust His process. And when you get discouraged or feel like there's no end in sight, remember: God's got this!
After all, His timing is always perfect.
The Lord has already written your story and knows exactly when to bring you your happily ever after. While there may be more plot twists and turns than you anticipate, your Prince is out there and he's waiting for you, too.
To anyone still searching for "the one", be patient. Wait with confidence, knowing His answer to your prayers are closer than you think. Your time will come when you least expect it. And when you're faced with the temptations of this world, remember that you are with far more than rubies. (Proverbs 31:10)
So, when those never's strike, shift your focus to His promises. And as you wait, rest comfortably in the always.
As someone who has always believed in fairy tales, you too will find your Prince Charming—you may just have to kiss a few horny toads first.
“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. '” — Jeremiah 29:11
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