Growing up in a dysfunctional home, my faith journey took shape amidst the intricacies of my upbringing. With my mother practicing her faith and my father attending church, it may seem confusing to some, yet those who understand the complexities of my background will be able to empathise with the challenges I faced.
As an immigrant, adapting to a new culture added another layer of difficulty to my spiritual journey.
During my younger years, I attended my mother's church, but as I matured, I began questioning the alignment of the teachings with my own values and desired way of life.
During my college years, my journey to independent thinking began which included taking a world religion class.
Buddhism captivated my interest and for a while, I contemplated embracing it as my path, but as I delved deeper into its teachings, I realised that even within Buddhism, there existed divisions and contradictions which didn't resonate with me, so I chose to let it go.
In my early 20s, skepticism began to cloud my perception of the Bible, due to its various translations and the tendency of people to follow its teachings without critical thinking.
These thoughts prompted me to distance myself from the church I was attending at the time. Now, with the wisdom gained from life experiences, I have found a church community that aligns with my current beliefs.
It was during a challenging phase of my life that I felt the need to seek comfort and guidance from God, and this year, I made a conscious decision to recommit to my faith.
I enrolled in classes focused on mental health, marriage and other subjects, and came across a transformative video by a young woman who shared her healing journey, which emphasised the importance of connecting with one’s spirituality.
“Self-Analysis" by L. Ron Hubbard, guided me through a series of self-examinations aimed at gaining insight into my thoughts, emotions, and behaviours. Through the exercises recommended, I developed my self-confidence and self esteem.
I also had the privilege of taking a course called "Self Worth" by Karla Ellia, which further deepened my understanding of my self-worth, purpose, and the significance of God’s presence in my life.
Additionally, I participated in "The Reinvent Yourself Challenge" by Montelle Bee which taught me to confront my mindset, challenge limiting beliefs and learn how to overcome personal struggles.
While I acknowledge that I am still a work in progress and there is so much growth ahead, I am better able to embrace the journey with open arms, anticipating the woman I will become in the future.
To anyone facing struggles in life or their faith, I offer a word of encouragement: be gentle with yourself. It is normal to feel lost at times, but it is crucial to navigate that uncertainty.
Getting lost in the right way means engaging in actions that resonate with your inner self, even if they present challenges. Trust yourself and take those steps toward growth, for it is through this process that we find our authentic selves and forge a profound connection with our faith.
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