Finding Purpose and Identity

September 22, 2021 THE MMA TEAM

And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul?

Back in 2019 when I quit my job things seem to be headed into a non-stop downward spiral….

Let me rewind a little bit. 

Back in 2019 is when I really got saved and had a deep yearning to find a sense of purpose for my life.

In retrospect, I knew that God placed that desire in my heart.

I would be at work knowing deep down inside that there was something more beyond this for me.

Over time God showed me dreams and revelations of a glimpse of my future.

This was often confirmed by other people who knew little to nothing about me.

How could they possibly know what God has already shown me?

That is just how God works. He will confirm what He said to strengthen your faith.

Fast forward a little bit, I knew it was time to let go of my job and work on my blog and YouTube channel.

God gave me personal confirmation, used other people and various dreams.

I was very reluctant initially because this was a huge leap of faith for me.

Anyone who knows me knows that I hate taking huge risks!  But, I had the faith to know that He would come through if anything were to happen that I haven’t planned for! 

People continuously questioned me and it felt like I was being punished for my obedience.

It reminds me of the time Joseph was thrown into prison for NOT sleeping with Potiphar’s wife.

After a year of not working, I eventually took on a job and would feel even worse than before.

Things did not turn out how I expected and my situation was seemingly going down not up.

I felt heartbroken that God did not come through as I expected Him to, but His plans are always different from ours.

At that point in my life, I felt the lowest. I had non-stop regret and pain.

 I wouldn’t pray.

I wouldn’t fast anymore.

I would barely read the Bible or attend church.

My depression was at an all-time high.

I almost felt a sense of betrayal.

Joseph was shown in a dream that he would be in a high place of authority,  but he wasn’t shown the journey it would take to get there.

Often people show the highlights of their journey with God but neglect to show the struggles and battles they had to go through.

Joseph was sold into slavery and thrown into prison for doing what was actually right.

Just when he thought he was about to get out, he had to stay even longer.

But the scripture constantly said that God was with him.

Although I was angry with God, He continuously showed me that He was with me.

Random people that I did not know personally would reach out to me to give me a word of encouragement because they said God had placed me in their hearts, and although this season was rough, it was in this season that I finally found myself.

I discovered my strengths, weaknesses, talents, what I liked, what I disliked, and who I was in Christ.

I learned why I do certain things, think certain ways, how my past traumas affected my present and how to deal with certain people and situations.

What would be the point of living out your purpose and the dreams that God gave you if you are spiritually and emotionally underdeveloped?

We have to be willing to go through the preparation season so that the responsibility God gives us will not collapse over time.

Above all else, our souls are most precious to God. What would be the point of gaining everything if you lose your soul in the end?

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