I was 17 years of age when I accepted Jesus Christ in my life. I distinctly remember that day when I knelt beside my bed and asked Jesus to come into my life.
At such a young age I did not understand what a Christian's life entailed, but I learnt as I went along.
I dedicated my life to bible study and found a church to help me grow and fellowship with other believers. But I felt I was missing out on life. You see I grew up very sheltered, and I felt I needed more.
I made some very poor decisions in my early Christian walk, and every time I did something wrong I was filled with this intense remorse. I felt God was disappointed in me. However, instead of running to Him to ask forgiveness and receive His grace, I ran away from Him and got myself into more trouble.
Then one day I found myself pregnant, at 19 years old. I panicked. How am I going to tell my parents? I told them, and they almost kicked me out. Almost.
Then a few months after having my first child, I was pregnant again. The only thing left to do was get married, of course. After all, it was the right thing to do. At least that’s what I thought. But life did not get better.
In my fifth month of pregnancy, I lost the baby, a boy. An overwhelming feeling of pain and loss overtook me for months. I was miserable and lonely. It took a long time before I felt like myself again.
A few years later I became pregnant again and lost this baby in my seventh month. It was a girl. After this, I vowed never to have any more children. I eventually left my husband and returned home to my parents. My husband and I divorced, after five years of marriage.
I needed to make a fresh start and by no means was it easy. Relationship after relationship failed. Eventually I had to ask myself what was I really searching for? There was only one thing to do, return to the person who truly loved me. Jesus.
I went back to church and focused on building my life and career. Eventually, I found someone and was able to settle down and build a family. After vowing not to have any more children, we have two beautiful children, a boy, and a girl. My son believes they are each reincarnations of the babies I lost previously. Who knows maybe they are.
As I look back I see God's hand in directing and guiding my life. I honestly think if I did not accept Jesus in my youth, my life would have turned out much differently. Making that conscious decision to make a fresh start made all the difference in the world.
Jesus said, "… no one pours new wine into old wineskins. Otherwise, the wine will burst the skins, and both the wine and the wineskins will be ruined. No, they pour new wine into new wineskins.” Mark 2:22 NIV.
In the original context Jesus meant that the old faith of Judaism and the new faith of Christianity cannot be mixed (King James Study Bible Notes). It applies to our lives as well in that we have to get rid of our old way of life so that our new life in Christ can grow and mature.
Just as new wine would burst the old wineskin after fermentation, mixing our old way of life with our new life in Christ will cause our entire life to shatter and become destroyed.
Similarly, we must put off our old selves and put on a new self. A new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness (see Ephesians 4:22-24 NIV). I got a fresh start when I left my old life behind and returned to Jesus.
My children are my pride and joy, and I am so blessed to have them. Even though they are in their teens, they take such wonderful care of me! They are my best friends.
By giving your life to Jesus He can turn your life around no matter what you have done or what circumstances you find yourself in. He is the key to a fresh, new start.
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